Saturday, February 12, 2011
Here I am, Once again....
Saturday is here again. It comes once a week and every single time it comes I am left with the same feeling of confusion. We do not attend church as a family. We haven't done so regularly in a couple of years now. The reasons are not something I care to go into because despite my personal issues with my church, I do LOVE First United Methodist in Sheffield. I love the people, I love the building, I love the familiarity of it all. I love the sense of family that I have there. And its also possible that I love it because its comfortable. The easy fix to all of this is to go find another church. That isn't so easy honestly. My 7 year old is 100% completely happy there. She has friends there. She loves her teachers. She looks forward to being there. So, we take her to every children's activity that we are able to take her to. So the dilemma is this...am I wrong to not go to church as a family. Is it wrong that I am more concerned about her soul, because I feel like my soul is just fine. My grandmother wants us to attend there as a family again. She says that whatever problems I have are not something that I should let keep me away. She says that I should be there even more because I have the issues. But i just can't do that. Its best if I keep my distance because it affects my spirit. I pray about this but I never feel like I get clarity on the issue. Sometimes I think that we should all just wake up one Sunday and randomly pick a church. But Sarah Grace is just so happy. I can't do that to her. So whats the answer to this? I will keep searching until I have peace with it. I know people say that church is not necessary to be a christian. And that is correct. But on the other hand, I do feel that it is soooo important when you have small children. So, until my vision is clear, I will pray.....
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Sarah Grace is only 7. If you did find another church where you all can worship, you might find that she is happy in another setting. If not, maybe she could attend with grandma while you attend somewhere else where you can be fed spiritually and find fellowship with other believers. Working two church schedules into one family can be challenging, but maybe God has a plan for this. Just pray that He will show you the way He wants you to go, then try something different. Sometimes staying the same is just a path to complacency that causes stagnation and a "no growth" lifestyle. Your kids need to see you model what you know is important. If they don't see you attending church as an adult, when they become older, they won't see it as a priority either.
ReplyDeleteI have just recently had to make this decision. I knew that my children are very resilient and will be happy most anywhere. I couldn't see hurting any part of my family... so John and I made a decision that didn't hurt anyone and once the children got used to the idea we knew everyone could be happy and enjoy attending. We asked them to give it a few months and then if they did not like it and truly were unhappy we would happily go back... but they loved it just like I knew they would... and part of the reason they love it so much is because we all go together. It is not a permanent thing... you can always change your mind but I do agree that it is important for your children to see mommy and daddy there with them and I think it is important to find somewhere you can worship and serve and not be a pew warmer... that's just my opinion but I will pray for your decision as well!
ReplyDeletethanks beth! I just now saw this but I really appreciate your input. It means a lot coming from you because you have been in my shoes in some ways.
ReplyDeleteMargaret,, I totally agree with you. Being where we are is definitely easiest. But not always best.
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